Monday, April 29, 2013

Post trip musings.

"I just think that every time you love someone, even in the smallest way, you give them a bit of yourself. But we are finite beings and if you give too much away, you will have nothing left. Then, you will never be able to love again the way you can, now. And the idea of that is just so sad to me, to not feel anything. 

So, to keep from running empty, I try to snatch back the pieces of myself that I had let you hold on to. 'It's mine, give it back. I was just letting you borrow it for a while but I want it back now because I need it. It's not for you.'" 

Three countries in a month, and I think I have had enough of living out of a suitcase for a while.

And as I stared at the crystal clear waters in Krabi, things suddenly worked themselves out. I realized you were never coming back, and people were always going to be selfish, no matter what glorified excuses they managed to spew out. And so the only way out was to make myself whole again, to fill myself up with all the goodness I could ever offer.

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